Friday, January 29, 2010

Grandma in Court

Grandma in CourtIn a trial, a small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, an elderly grandmother to the stand.

He approached her and asked; " Mrs.. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I have known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you are a big disappointment to me.

You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you are a big shot when you have not the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher.

Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, " Mrs.. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I have known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster. He is lazy, bigoted, and has a drinking problem. He cannot build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women.

One of them was your wife. Yes I know him."

The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both lawyers to approach the bench and in a quiet voice said: "If either of you rascals asks her if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair."