Sunday, April 26, 2009

Clever Salesman

Clever SalesmanA well-dressed salesman stopped a man in the street and asked -
'Sir, would you like to buy a bottle of this mouthwash for $200?'

The man said, "Are you nuts? that's robbery!"

The salesman seemed hurt and then tries again -
'Sir, since you are a bit irate, I'll sell it to you at half price - $100?'

Yet again, the man replies frankly – 'You must be crazy pal, now go away!'

The salesman then reaches into his suitcase and take out two cakes and begins eat up on one of them. He tells the annoyed guy -
'Sir, please share one of my cakes since I have irritated you so much'.

Unwrapping the cake, the guy takes a bite; rapidly, the guy spits it out and says:
'Hey,' he snarled, 'this cake tastes like crap!'

'It is,' the salesman responded. 'Wanna buy some mouthwash?'

Monday, April 13, 2009

Jokes Galore

Jokes GaloreRegardless of what you may hear, there's still many women these days, who are excellent "housekeepers". Seems each time they get a divorce, they keep the house.


A French guest, staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room service for some pepper. "Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge. "Toilette pepper!"


Moe: My wife converted me to religion.
Joe: Really?
Moe: Yes. Until I married her I didn't believe in hell.


Mary Jane was walking on the beach one day and saw a shark swimming around a man.
The man was screaming, "Help me! Help me!"
Mary Jane laughed and laughed! She knew that the shark was never going to help that man!


Q: How does a man show he's planning for the future?
A: He buys two cases of beer instead of one.


I was out with one of my best drinking buddies, George, and he was talking about marriage, and then his wife. He drank some, then said,
"Well, what it comes down to Jimmy, is... well... my wife knows nothing of my wants and needs... she's hardly ever in the mood for sex... I guess what it comes down to is that my wife just doesn't understand me at all, does yours ?"

I thought about it a minute or two, then said. "I don't think so George, as a matter of fact, I don't recall her ever even mentioning your name at all."


Two poor kids were invited by a rich kid to a swimming party at his pool.
When they were changing into their swim trunks, one turned to the other
and said: "Did you notice the small dongs on the rich kids?"
The other answered: "Yeah! It's probably because they have toys to play